2008-03-03
meh fine
Long time, no entry. I'd say all is calm, but alas, that would be a lie.
T's mom died suddenly on Friday after a short 24 hour incident. It was very much "Mom's in the hospital" and "Mom's passed." While it's sad, her mom was one the kindest people, but also one of the most organized. It's only fitting that she would make quick work of it, neat and tidy like.
Last night M decided to stay up until 1:30 watching tv in the bedroom. As in the place I tried to sleep. TRIED. I ended up trying the recliner in the living room. All I got for it was a lot of anger, a sore body, and a headache. Oh yes, and the pleasure of calling someone an insensitive asshole at 1:30 in the morning. Sleep? What's that? So my eyes are still burning and have been since I was woken up. Bah, like it matters?
This morning was my delayed annual probing by my doctor. We discussed my weight. She mentioned weightloss surgery. I told her no, that I don't want to go that route, and it wouldn't work any how because I have zilch on the support system meter.
M brings me chips. Good friend Shell hasn't been going to the gym with me. My mom makes fat comments all the time. The few people I've reached out to have logistic problems and I've happily (I guess happily?) retreated back into my cave on those avenues any how. Devine intervention and tough love only work when you are open to them. My opening has been closed and locked tightly, like a big bank vault with that oh so cool boat wheel looking lock. Now all I can really say is "meh" and "fine." Honestly there isn't much more to say.
My gyno actually helped. Who would have thought that having a conversation while the main talker is scoping your whoo hoo would help your life?
There was more to it, but she's helped me focus on pushing 40.