2005-05-31
the real first entry
No longer schizophrenic! Ain't that the truth Ski-Ms.V I like that, I'll have to steal it. Thank God for the medication eh?
Now that I've finished all the drama of moving, I'm left thinking ....
"what the hell do I put here?!?!"
I could pretend I'm all new and shiney, and recap my life. Unfortunately there is a few hundred pages already doing that in the previously mentioned diaries. My life right now, as it is, is fine. Minus the bills that keep coming to my mail box. Silly people, like I have the money I need to live my lavious lifestyle and pay bills. Lottery take me away!
The reasoning of two diaries was that when I really started focusing on my weight I thought I might being boring readers who could care less to tears. It's taken me this long and a question by wilyred (why two? why why? Only she didn't ask quite ... ok, anything like that!) to decide to recombine. I think it was the combination of the question and the medications I'm on finally working that made me think "hey you dumb ass, why are you working so hard???"
So there you go. Some days may be all weight loss & weight watcher's related. Some may not dance near my weight. Some may include both. Consider yourself warned or enlightened, which ever path you prefer.
It's a Monday-Tuesday, meaning yesterday was a day off and that messes up my week. Not that it matters when next Monday we start our summer schedule. I'll work Monday - Thursday, shiny 7 a.m. to dull dingey 5 p.m., with the exception of Tuesday when I skip out for my WW meeting. Yep, I refused to change meeting times. I like my meeting, I have the vacation time, and this is all about me. I have to do this for myself.
This weekend was long and mostly good. I cannot for the life of me figure out yet why when my boyfriend (M) misses me, he leaves cell phone messages that make me want to drive my car into a tree. After the fact I get told to ignore the message. To late fuck nut! I heard it! It doesn't work that way. I very calmly told him that he broke my heart and that doesn't make me feel very friendly to him.
All is okay now and I didn't binge, even after that. I thought about what I want most in life (better health) and how b/p wasn't the road to acheiving this. Plus I figure if he's going to continue such asshat manuevers, I might as well be in fine form to 1) be on my own or 2) be with someone else.
Yesterday I went for a 3 mile walk. It was the most gorgeous forest preserve with a terrific path. That being said, there were many times when I found myself peering into the woods thinking "what if I spot a body?" Thankfully I had my cell phone and I need new glasses. The walk was totally corpse free! I don't feel too bad either. I'm sure my weigh in will suck. I've walked so much in the last week that my legs are getting shape to them. The muscle will add to the number this week, but it will go in time. I'm just eager as hell to hit the 50 pound mark and I have 6.2 pounds I think to do that. No matter what the scale says, I am wearing a pair of capris that I was thrilled just a few weeks ago to fit into (bought them on sale 2 years ago.) I'm thrilled yet perplexed to say they are getting loose already. I am under growing my summer clothes. Since I'm too poor to buy new ones and I hate belts, nudity is the only option. Ok, not nudity, skivvies.
And on that note, I must go!